Embracing Death: Live with an expiration date in mind

Most people are afraid of death. It looms heavy in their mind. People deal with this differently.

Some distract themselves in various ways. They stay busy with this or that and pretend that the fear is not there, or perhaps they haven't discovered it yet.

Some meet death head on and repeatedly expose themselves to the infinite number of ways that their lives could end.

Personally, I have found that my own fear of death didn't show its head until I was in my twenties when I joined the military.  I spent more than 20 years in the Army and had many brushes with death, so it's a topic that I have given and continue to give thought to.

For a long time, I felt invisible. For a long time, life felt new and exciting and was a wonderful distraction. Now, like so many before me, I find myself contemplating the impermanence of life.

Starting at the time of our birth the clock starts ticking. It's interesting to think that the only guarantee that any of us have in life is that we will someday die.  All of us will.

Dead Man!

I spent a year abroad traveling around Europe after I graduated from high school. At some point during my quest, I met an older gentleman in Sweden. Back then I was a talkative fellow, always trying to have a conversation with everyone.

On a random day, I started up a conversation with a stranger and we talked for hours while sitting at an outside cafe. We had tea and hard bread with cheese, and I tried caviar for the first time (Kalles Kaviar).

This happens often in Sweden, when you get together and eat a light meal such as this. The pace of life there can be pleasant.  There's no hurry.

His English was better than my Swedish, and I still remember his first question, "Vill du ficka?"  Roughly translated, "Would you like to sit down, relax, and have some tea and crumpets?"

So what does this have to do with a dead man, you ask?

Well, other than the fact that he has surely passed on by now since this occurred decades ago, it was something that he told me. I think the old guy liked me and wanted to impart some sort of wisdom to the younger generation. We were talking about what I wanted to do with my life, my goals, my aspirations.

His secret, he told me, "You're looking at a dead man!"

He told himself everyday. He reminded himself that his time was limited, and that he could be gone in an instant. He meditated on the idea that he should use every day to its fullest and not waste the time that he was given.

Begrudging Fate

It's futile to worry and stress about things we can't change. Only an idiot would think that they could. But, unfortunately, that's exactly what most of us do. We fruitlessly fret over aspects of life we can do nothing about. 

There is a fine balance in life between self-betterment and inevitability, and I believe that admitting to one's self and accepting and reminding one's self that "I will soon die," is the first step to improving both parts of one's life.

There is the obvious take away, that optimizing the time we have alive will lead to a more effective life, but the pattern it shows us, to not begrudge fate, is a better lesson to learn. It's a better concept to employ.

When you look in a mirror and don't like your nose, do you let that affect you negatively? Are you ashamed to go out in public, because you don't like your nose? 

Maybe it's not your nose, maybe it something else. The way you sound when you talk, the way you look when you walk. In all of these examples you are creating a problem (an issue) where there isn't one.

People are insane!

There is something very unhinged about human beings and our so called consciousness. Are we so much more advanced than all other life on this planet yet begrudge what we can't change, or shouldn't attempt to?

We don't hold anything to the level of illogical judgement that we do ourselves. It's insanity. 

My dog doesn't see her reflection in her water bowl and wallow in misery because she lost her tooth. My dog's is literally a rock hound, by the way. She loves to pick up random rocks on the trail and carry them everywhere we go. 

She's crazy in her own way, but she's unapologetically happy about it. When she sees her missing tooth (if that is even possible) she is filled with joy and contentment. She lives a life of harmony. 

Sometimes, I think I need to invent an philosophy called Dogism, or how about The Dao of Dog?

During our daily walks, I often ponder her characteristics, and wonder if I would be happier if I had the same. One can learn a lot by examining the traits of animals. 

Final Thoughts

So this was a post sans Cigar. (sans means without in French, if you're wondering)

The fact is, I will probably write more than I smoke and drink. Even though your reading the words of a Dead Man, I don't necessarily want to hurry the process any more than I already am. 

I lost my mother to cancer about five years ago. I watched her fight for her last breath and the experience is a scar on my soul. 

When I was younger, during war, I reveled in the death of my enemies. I laughed and cheered as I killed. I lost my innocence and worse, for a time, my humanity in Afghanistan... and now?

Now, I find all life to be beautiful. I find all life a gift and a miracle. This world we live in, this simulation of thought and experience we perceive is precious.

So many of our problems (perhaps all) are cause by ourselves. At a minimum, the problems are made worse by our own judgement. 

Through philosophy, through thought and reason, we can hone and focus our judgement for the better. We can accept fate and live harmoniously with that which we were given, harmoniously with who we are. 

That is, if we think.

~ Daft Sage